I need a manicure …

As I was eating my breakfast, I noticed that my nailpolish was chipped so I decided that I’d remove it immediately after I’d washed up the dishes. My manicure stuff is in my bathroom cabinet but I can’t enter the bathroom without my bladder clamouring for attention. Sitting on the loo, I noticed that my bathroom floor wasn’t as clean as it should be, so I got out my Swiffer mop and other relevant cleaning materials  and gave the bathroom a thorough clean. 

Mop in hand, I moved to the only other room with a tiled floor, the kitchen, and there also left every surface sparkling – at least, as far as I could reach up on the cabinet doors. Tall people might notice a tide mark at the 6 ft level. Cleaning the kitchen, I noticed that behind the door there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of in Horatio’s philosophy – but Horatio was a man, so he wouldn’t have needed to dream of ironing boards, aprons and recycling. There was also a fair amount of sorting out needed among my cleaning products and utensils, but now that job is done too.

As I bent down, the waist button popped off my shorts (yes, this is a sweaty job, shorts and a suntop are my indoors Mrs Mop gear) and without it, the zip kept coming undone so that button had to be sewn back on and my sewing things reorganised. 

With bathroom and kitchen gleaming, the carpet in the other rooms looked in need of attention so out came the vacuum cleaner. I love my vacuum cleaner. It’s small and easy to use and takes up very little room, unlike those I have had before with long hoses that refuse to wrap into a neat little parcel and hide behind doors or curtains (my apartment is small and short on storage). I had covered about two square metres when the battery died. 

Oh well, it’s actually recommended that you should dust before you hoover, so while the battery on my vacuum cleaner was recharging I dusted all the surfaces in my living room, including all the picture frames and little knick-knacks (yes, I did pick each item up and dusted under it, unlike the last cleaning lady I had, even though she was Swiss!), polished the mirrors (I have several, not because I like looking at myself but to reflect the light and make the room look bigger) and other glass surfaces – but resisted the windows this time.

After this some  pictures were hanging crooked, so I tried to straighten them but the nails holding two of them fell out; my walls are concrete, and it’s a devil of a job to get a nail to hold without drilling but if the picture isn’t heavy and nobody breathes within a metre of it, the nail will usually hold. When the nail falls out, though, it tends to leave quite a large hole. Out came the mastic and as I was smoothing it into the holes with my finger, I noticed that my nail polish looked really bad …

Well, the vacuum cleaner battery is fully charged now, so I’ll just finish off the living room and start on the bedroom before I do my nails, otherwise the polish will get chipped again before it’s dry … And anyway, it’s almost lunchtime, so I’ll just remove the polish and come back to the rest later … I think …

22 thoughts on “I need a manicure …

  1. Except for the nails, I was raised to consider this kind of work genderless. I shop for groceries, do laundry, do house cleaning and cooking is my specialty. I told Chris before we got married that I don’t need a house keeper, I need a wife. After thirty-six years of marriage, I think she finally got it. Haratio?

    • Ah, you and Chris are truly blessed! In my one-person household, it all falls to me – except when a kind person with a car takes me shopping. I paid a cleaning lady for a while, asking her to do the jobs I couldn’t, but she couldn’t either! So it’s back to doing it myself. Good healthy exercise!
      Horatio appears in Hamlet, Act I, scene 5: “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” (Oh, naughty Shakespeare – a dangling preposition!!)

      • Oh. I know who Haratio is, even though I’m not a Shakespeare fan. I was just questioning his maleness (in your reference) and how has no place in my life when it comes to good, old fashioned house chores.The work has no gender.

      • Aha – sorry, I was slow on the uptake! I very much appreciate the value of the modern man – my son-in-law and both my grandsons-in-law are paragons in that respect. No insult to modern males intended – Horatio was of his time! And I’m sure he didn’t have an ironing board!

    • The Flylady calls this SHE – the Sidetracked Home Executive. I forgot to mention that as I fished in my toolbox for the hammer, I spilt a million assorted nails/rawlplugs/hooks/ etc. and spent another hour sorting them back into their respective compartments!

  2. At least you seem to be completing each task as you go. After I retired I would start one task which would send me to a new location in the house and I’d get distracted and start a project in that area, which lead me to another area and I’d see something else that needed attention…each of these distractions meant another unfinished project. I’d wonder where I began. It was crazy because while I worked I was so task oriented and focused that I never left anything undone. I guess now I’ve been retired long enough that I just let things go till they just can’t be ignored any longer.

    My toenails are looking like your fingernails and I keep putting that chore off because I also need to trim the devils and I hate dealing with those monsters. It seems I need hoof nippers these days.

  3. Yes, I know the feeling living on my own. Lately I seem to actually enjoy doing the chores. Perhaps I am slipping . On my grave stone the saying; “Here lies a man fond of vacuuming and detergents, keep off the grass.”

    • Love that epitaph! There’s a positive side to everything, even housework. And when you live on your own, it’s your own fault if “somebody” makes a mess – no family to blame! So I find the place stays tidier longer.

  4. ” but Horatio was a man, so he wouldn’t have needed to dream of ironing boards, aprons and recycling. “………………yeah nah!…..That’s why they pack the gear you bought at the hardware into one of those spare boxes (Always too big or too small) they keep handy by the exit doors…NOT to carry stuff home in, but to use to throw those loose things you end up cluttering behind the door that stops you from opening it right out..then you stack them..

      • There are so many things that men have to think about…that’s why it takes some time for them to get around to get things done…there’s so much to think about………………………………..women, for just one, f’rinstance…..

  5. Just for the hell of it….:

    The Black Cat
    May look smart,
    But it’s got no evidence
    On me.
    And until they perfect
    Paw prints,
    I’ll sit here looking sweet
    And “innocent”…
    Signed: The Grey Tabby.

    (There is a pic goes with it, but I cannot put it up here..)

  6. The story of my life! The job I intend to tackle becomes side tracked which then leads to another and another. I then feel I’ve achieved nothing! I function best when I am expecting visitors, it’s amazing what one can achieve having a minimal time limit..
    At 80 I have become an A1 procrastinator, I see jobs waiting and pull out my crossword puzzles. There’s always tomorrow.. One thing I never miss is making my bed. After a good airing it’s my first job. I can’t function with crumpled bed clothes looking at me! That’s sad 🙄😔😞

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